Terrapin Station

Dentally speaking

I went to the dentist today.

Photo: Atlanta Dental Services.  These are NOT my x-rays.

There are many parts of my life that I understand to be the direct result of great privilege. An emphasis on education is one; the fact the two of my four grandparents were college graduates as well both of my parents. My mother hung her two degrees over the laundry room in our home throughout my growing-up.

Another is the understanding that people must have health insurance. My parents were without it very briefly when I was in college, and it was reasonably close to disaster.  I have built my career around being very sure I had it.  (Knock, knock...)

There are so many things...but today's is dental health. In my growing-up, we went to the dentist once a year (as I recall) because: "You have to take care of your teeth. They are the only ones you are going to get." The dentist was named Mitt Sorrells (the only ever "Mitt" I've ever heard of) and when we went in as kids we got GORGEOUS rings!!! 

I had my wisdom teeth out in 9th grade. Had I not, my smile would be much less attractive today. 

When I was having some gum trouble in college, the dentist recommended, and my parents agreed, to send me to a periodontist (my dad had ongoing gum issues). I learned to brush and floss in a way that felt almost too good. (Should I feel guilty about this?)

When I moved to this university from a Much Larger Texas University, I was shocked that dental insurance was not included in my benefits, but there was no question that I would be buying it.  Now I see the dentist twice a year, because my insurance covers it. Today,  my teeth were cleaned and examined. The dentist showed me my digital x-rays on a big screen attached to the chair, and pointed out where a very small cavity is starting between two of my upper teeth. I made an appointment to have it filled. Preventative care...aah. 

I am so lucky. I was taught to take care of my teeth early, and I've seen enough dental problems in my family that, if I'd considered quitting, I'm sure not going to now.

 

 

So, for Lent

I have a secret thing I am giving up but I'm not telling what it is. It's between me and God.

Also, I am participating in the Ignatian Prayer Adventure again. I'll keep you posted.

Tonight, I am making potato pancakes. 

Body image and punishment...and a reprieve

I loved Beyoncé's Super Bowl performance. She was athletic, powerful, and she looked like she was having a BLAST. It's also been pointed out that she looks like a real woman instead of a Barbie doll...and she'd have to, to be sporting muscles like that and to have that kind of stamina.

She looks like a hella fit woman.

Over the last few years as my weight has continued to sneak up (following the Friday Five theme of sneaking here), I've changed some things. I don't wear uncomfortable shoes any more. Ever. Life is too short. I also dress more casually for work...while Ken was sick I developed a sort of uniform (slacks, one of several colored t-shirts, a jacket or overshirt) and wore it all the time. This is rather astonishing, when I remember that in junior high and high school I had a little daybook and every day I wrote down exactly what I wore, to be sure I never repeated an outfit in a two-week period. 

REALLY?? Who was THAT girl!? Someone scared and uncertain, for sure. Oh, and she thought she was fat.  :)  Ha, if only she had known.

Back in December, before I went to The Glorious Wedding of Great Joy, I made my BFF go with me to help me buy an outfit for the festivities. I knew it was going to be in a size I didn't like, and I knew I would need support for that. Thank goodness for her! (Although she did, on our shopping trip, buy herself some shoes in a child's size, because she is THAT petite. But I forgive her.)

Later, on my own, feeling horrible about myself and how I looked in the new purple suit, I went out and bought "cheap Spanx" - the Assets brand at Target.  If you don't know what Spanx are, they are GIRDLES. Lots and lots of different kinds of girdles. Which I, as a feminist and someone wishing and trying to love my body, have always refused to even consider.

You know what makes me furious about those products? Take a look at their website. Do any of those women look like they need "shaping" or "smoothing" or "slimming"? No, they do not. Because if they put real people on the website, no one would buy the stuff, because it'd be clear:   Spanx aren't magic...they are foundation garments. And, um: they hurt.  No one wearing them is smiling like those gals do.

So, here's the good part of the story.

I arrived in Boston and met up with my friends for the wedding rehearsal. And we laughed and we cried and we hugged each other, and we ate dinner at a very suspicious restaurant...

and I went home to bed at my wonderful friend's house...

and I felt empowered. Filled with love and joy, and no longer afraid. No longer needing to hide in that way. I got up the day of the wedding and when it came time to get dressed, I left that miserable garment in the suitcase. Ha HA!!!

And here is the whole wedding party, including me as one of the flower girls. :)

Having said all that...I want and I need to make a change. But I want to do it well...with eating right and exercise, as my chiropractor and I get my muscles back where they need to be for such activity. Not with something that would squeeze the life out of me, and punish me. 

I want to live. 

Sneaky Friday Five

Karla gives us this week's RevGals Friday Five:

Who knew it was the Second Friday of the month?   

Thank goodness something reminded me, but my apologies for the late post.  I have been busy getting ready for Blizzard Nemo (really, 24 inches in Boston?  Why on earth don't I have a snow blower???) and pondering life transitions--oh, but enough about me.  

Be safe and warm, Karla!!

How about you?  

1) What is sneaking up on you, and what have you been thinking about?  I want and need to go visit my parents. I was going to do it next weekend but now something has gotten slotted in there. I must put a weekend on the calendar so that cannot happen again...or it will keep sneaking and getting put off. 

Oh...and I put out the last of the sunflower seeds for Mr. Squirrel yesterday, and I am thinking he is going to sneak up on the windowsill any time and look INQUIRING. And importunate.  And hungry.

2)  What will you have for lunch today?  Almost certainly a salad with feta cheese, chopped rotisserie chicken, and whatever else I can find to go on it. It's my go-to lunch.

3)  If you were to get snowed in for two days, and you need to hunker down, what essentials and treats would you store up? Sandwich stuff for Ken. Black beans/lentils and rice for me. Chips & salsa & guacamole. Dog treats for sure (we love Yummy Chummies!). And for human libations, I would make a big batch of The Recipe. This is a secret, legendary mixture to which our local newspaper columnist of many years (recently retired) has been referring forever, and she has finally released the recipe on her blog. You saw it here first!!  

4) Tell me a story about one awesome thing you have experienced in the last couple of weeks. Well, it seems too easy to say the Big Event...which is in its own category of awesome.

On the first night of the cruise, as I was lying in bed drifting off, I had the very clear thought: "This is where I come every year to remember who I am." So I will say: coming home from the Big Event with a newly cleared mind, a renewed sense of who I am, and new gratitude for the people in my daily life and in my virtual life, too. 

5)  What is your favorite office supply to splurge on? (now THAT is random, right?)  - Markers and pens.  Ooh! I have so many markers I do not need ONE MORE but I just love them. Sharpies, watercolor markers, slimline markers...my latest jones is for the Sharpie Brush Tip collection.

(pic from Mommy Kat & Kids)

Cleansing

"Water reflects the human soul. If you say, 'thank you' to water, it will be reflected in the form of beautiful crystals overflowing with gratitude in return."

-Masuru Emoto, The Secret Life of Water (found on the Water is Life Facebook page).

 

The RevGals Big Event 6.0 was wonderful. It would have been wonderful no matter the quality of the ports, the food, the speaker, or anything, but just  because of the group of women assembled. However, all of those things were good. 

I often tell people about the BE trips that I don't care where the boat docks, as long as I'm with the RevGals. Last year I barely got off the boat at all. Ahh, the peace of it! 

This year I did go ashore in both ports - Key West and Nassau. I ended up with pictures of graves and memorial stones from both places, because that's something I really like. 

   Key West Cemetery with iguana and rooster

 

  Episcopal Cathedral, Nassau, Bahamas

 

The speaker was especially wonderful. Rachel Hackenberg is a UCC pastor and author of Writing to God: Forty Days of Praying with My Pen. I reviewed it in 2011 and still think it's a terrific book.  Rachel's presentation had us look at words, how we understand them (and don't), learning to play with words and see them differently. By the end of our time together we were writing prayers in various creative ways. It was freeing, enlightening, sometimes troubling (good growth there!) and, overall, outstanding. 

One of the resources she shared with us was Masuru Emoto's The Hidden Messages in Water. From the Amazon.com book description:

This book has the potential to profoundly transform your world view. Using high-speed photography, Dr. Masaru Emoto discovered that crystals formed in frozen water reveal changes when specific, concentrated thoughts are directed toward them. He found that water from clear springs and water that has been exposed to loving words shows brilliant, complex, and colorful snowflake patterns. In contrast, polluted water, or water exposed to negative thoughts, forms incomplete, asymmetrical patterns with dull colors. The implications of this research create a new awareness of how we can positively impact the earth and our personal health.

Hmm.

The day we were in the Bahamas I came back early for a massage.  The therapist who worked on me kept saying, "oh, you have lots of knots in your muscles! you have so many lumps!" Yes, yes, I know that...it's why I'm here. 

After the treatment was over, she talked to me about moving out the toxins released by drinking lots of water.  She said, "remember that your body is 75% water, like the ocean. Nobody cleans the ocean, it cleans itself."  (Google tells me that the figure is actually about 50% for adult women.)  Of course, the ocean has a hell of a lot to clean up besides its own mess. Maybe there's a parallel there with TV and internet and....

...

As I look back on these things, I see a theme of water and cleansing that goes with my word for the year, clear.

Last week I wrote a love letter, and a lot of six-word prayers. I read a memoir, ate sushi, and I rested. I talked to friends. I ate big breakfasts and drank drinks with umbrellas in them. When I was over-peopled, I went somewhere else.

Being at sea for five days, rocked on the bosom of the deep with some of my favorite people in the world...no responsibilities, no expectations, no choices in terms of clothes (wear what fit in the carry-on bag!) - was a cleansing. A washing-through that allowed my mind to detox, the knots in my thinking to work out.

May I remember the lesson in the months to come.