My life has been touched by suicide twice...almost three times.
1) A person dear to me attempted suicide, but did not succeed. I am grateful and I believe that person is, too. It has been many years ago now, but I will never forget visiting in the psych ward and seeing someone I loved so far out on the edge of reality.
The good news, the good story, is that this person is still here, and making an amazing contribution to the world each day.
2) My cousin, Beth, killed herself when I was in graduate school. My parents called to tell me she was dead, and then told me she had committed suicide.
3) My high school love killed himself just a few years ago. I regret to this day not having stayed better in touch...not that I truly think that could have changed a thing, but I regret it.
There is not good news or a good end to either of those stories. THUNK. The End. It is horrible.
I took a Question, Persuade, Refer (QPR) training at my university a few years ago. The very night I took it, I had dinner with someone I know very slightly...who had been depressed. She told me she had been feeling like she didn't want to go on living....and I had words to say.
I asked her, "Have you been thinking about killing yourself?" (Question.) She indicated she had, but didn't think she would now. But I didn't stop there.
I listened to her talk and got her to promise me (Persuade) that she would see a counselor the very next day. I told her I would call to be sure she had done it.
I checked with her the next day (Refer) and listened to her talk about what the counselor had said. I found out when the next meeting was. I followed up again over the following weeks.
The better solution on "Refer" is actually to take the person to a mental health professional yourself. My friend would not do that with me. But I took the action for her that I could.
I was so grateful to the training that provided me that plan of action, and the fact that I used it the very day I learned it was "a God thing." I also was grateful to know that resources like 1-800-SUICIDE are available any time for advice and direction.
We have to tell these stories. We have to lose any stigma or shame associated with suicide, so that people know there are resources for help. The world needs less broken hearts.
