In my body work session yesterday we discussed some evening prayer/centering techniques.
I am praying and hoping for help with The Thing that causes me to want to rise and eat in the evening after dinner, kitchen cleaning, husband asleep.
This line from the Compline service rose to meet me:
Be sober, be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith. 1 Peter 5:8-9a
"The devil," interesting language...but that is sure enough what it feels like. I know that I pursue these behaviors because I am seeking nurture and comfort; and when I allow myself to be devoured, I am not getting the REAL thing.
My mind and body are certainly not connected, nor do I feel real, when it happens. I want to be conscious. I want to be real.
