I am eating broccoli with cheese sauce and waiting for it to be time to go south to acolyte for the 10:30 pm service.
I am here to say that I'm grateful for the idea and reality of Longest Night or Blue Christmas services...fairly new to me and I've participated for the last few years. I haven't had any major losses in these years, and indeed, much joy; but it is really a gift to sit with the idea that not everything has to be perfectly happy and sparkly for Christmas. In fact....perhaps it ought not to be.
The world seems darker and more horrific each day...each hour.
Then there are stories of graciousness and giving.
The person in front of me in traffic does not see the light turn green, but I have more patience with her than I usually might, because she is wearing a Santa hat.
Then there are murders, devastations, no Christmas in Nineveh this year.
I feel mostly powerless, but I let the elderly man with 3 items go ahead of me at the grocery.
What difference does it make?
With a dear friend and also with my spouse this week, I've had conversations about how I'm very, very happy with my life, yet watching Christmas in the media, on Facebook, etc., can really bring me down. Sometimes I just need to walk away.
I haven't decorated at all for Christmas this year, and that's okay, but why do I feel that it is not? Such a lot of expectations swirling around my head.
I just read this great article, Merry Broken Christmas and it says it better than I can. Here's my takeaway line:
"All I want for Christmas is to be broken enough to be the stable and not the Inn."
Amen. Quickly come, Lord Jesus.